If you read this introduction already, just scroll down and start reading about Pride, otherwise it is recommended that you read the introduction bellow.
Let’s analyze how these common vices can affect your business and your overall income. You may think that the concept of deadly sins is a religious one and do not apply to you, but you may call them negative tendencies if you want. The fact is that you can find them in more or less intensity within most people.
You may not realize that one of these tendencies may be affecting you until I show you the details. If you realize that there is a problem, I will also give you the solution so you can fix it. I will explain and compare now the most common negative tendencies among people with their corresponding opposite virtues.
Before we start, I need to tell you something . . .
I. Most sins arise from: FEAR.
II. Most virtues arise from: LOVE.
III. Sins, vices and negative tendencies demonstrate weakness, while virtues demonstrate strength.
In my opinion the biggest virtue of all is COURAGE/CONFIDENCE, because it is the direct fruit of love, which dissipates fear and sow all other virtues in human’s hearts.
This is a series of articles about this subject. The whole series contain the following articles . . .
– PRIDE –
Some people simply have too much pride. They are the best. They know everything. They do everything right. Everybody else is wrong. Nobody seems to know anything, but them. Other people are ignorant, lazy, inferior. They feel they are surrounded by idiots. They do not understand why they are not rich already. After all they deserve to be rich.
They believe that it is unfair for them to live as common people, like a poor or middle class person, because they know that they are wealthy, they just don’t have the money. They have class, style, intelligence, everything. They are not just like other inferior human beings.
Proud individuals suffer a lot when they can not live up to their expectations. They feel it is unfair. They deserve to be on top of the world. They deserve to have. It is all about them, them, and them again. That’s how they think. They compare themselves to other people. If other people have more than they do, they feel bad about it. They don’t necessarily hate (feel envy for) others, but they compete to win, to be the best, in everything, always, with everyone.
Pride is competitive. You want to be better than others. You want to have more than others. You want to seem smarter, more attractive, wealthier, healthier, stronger, etc, etc; because after all, you are the best and you want others to tell you so and recognize it.
You want to be worshiped in some way for one, many or all of your qualities. You want everyone to notice that you are different, that you are better, because it is true. You feel better than others and other people should notice it and accept it, otherwise you will get disappointed.
They must honor you and respect you because you are superior. You have a position, an education, a career, a business, a financial position, a body, etc. You are, you are, you are, very proud of yourself.
Proud people are the haters’ nightmare because proud people use to flaunt it and show it. The jealous person may be resented because of other people’s sudden prosperity. You don’t have to do anything for them to feel bad about it. Now, if on top of that you excessively show to the world what you are, what you have and you even tell them in their face: “I am better than you”, imagine how you would make them feel.
On the other hand, many people that have too much pride don’t care about that. In fact they enjoy it. Some proud people enjoy the envy that others could feel for them. They want to flaunt it and make others suffer for it.
Understand that you could be the most miserable person on Earth and still have too much pride. Even poor people if they are too proud of whatever they are or whatever they think they are or deserve, will seek ways to receive the worship, honor and rewards that they think they deserve.
Pride is associated with vanity. You want people to look at you, your skills, your material goods (house, car, cloth, etc) and say: “Wow, I want to be him/her” or “wow I like him/her”, “he/she is the best”, “he/she is sooo rich, sooo cool, sooo pretty.” Do you get the point? It is all about you.
The proud person cares a lot about what other people think and say about them. They are always right. They do not care to change because they are always right and other people are always wrong. They care about what others say to correct their mistake. They want to know who is making negative comments to convince them and show them that they are wrong.
Proud people suffer a lot when they can not live up to their standards and their standards are usually quiet high. They want to be on top, if possible God himself; or at least the richest man, the hottest woman, the strongest one, etc. They exert a lot of energy into, again: themselves. Even if they feel empty inside, it doesn’t matter, what matter is the appearance. Right? Wrong!
The proud people are the hardest to convince that they are wrong, because they feel that they are always right. They have a too elevated opinion about themselves. They can not look themselves in the mirror and see their real image. Sometimes the image they see is far superior to the real one.
Understand something, we can very easily see other people’s defects, but it is not always easy to discover our own defects. This is specially true for proud people, who think that they are always right and they don’t need to change. They don’t need to listen to anybody else. They are right and others are wrong. If other people don’t do what they say, then they have a problem or something.
Proud people do not accept negative feedback. They hate negative feedback. They take it like an offense. No one has to tell them what to do or how to do it. They feel that they know everything. Just a simple suggestion and you could start a discussion with them.
Proud people try to hide their difficulties. They minimize their problems and maximize their success. They don’t leave space for mistakes. They are not honest with themselves and live a life of “looks.”
This is dangerous. Pride has been considered one of the root sins from which all others arise. Pride is blind. You can not convince a proud person that he/she is wrong. They won’t listen to you. They will pretend that they do, but they won’t, unless they recognize that they have too much pride and decide to change.
Now, let’s stop talking about pride and let’s talk about the virtue it opposes: Humility. The humble person do not compare himself/herself to others. They will want to have some things, for their own pleasure and to fulfill their needs, but not to be better than others.
The humble person listens to what others tell them. He/she sees feedback (positive or negative) as suggestions. They know that some people may feel envy for them. So, they scrutinize the feedback to find out if the person talking has reason or not. Smart humble people know that feedback is one of the most important parts of running a business. They want to know any suggestions that their clients or employees have for them.
Humble people do not expect to be on top of everybody else. They do not seek to be in a high position just for the pleasure of being on top. They do not seek the envy of others. They do not care much about what others think about them, except for the purpose of seeing how they can improve themselves based on the feedback they receive.
Humble people do not believe that they know everything. They do not think that they can do everything on their own. They seek the advice of others. They do not believe that they deserve it, they just believe that they can earn it. To be humble doesn’t mean to have low self-esteem. You know you can do it, but you accept that you are not perfect.
Something else, you do not try to hide, minimize, or otherwise suffer for your mistakes. Again you accept that you are not perfect and you don’t struggle to be perfect, because no one is perfect after all, only God. You always try to make no mistakes, but when a mistake happens, you don’t suffer because of it, you learn from it and move on.
How can you apply all this to your business. You can do it in many ways. First you can be the business owner with a lot of pride and you may not realize how much that could be damaging your profits. “Life is not about receiving, it is about giving.”
If everything is about me, my product, my service, my corporation, my profits, my business, me, mine, myself, myself alone, I did it, I know and I can; people will stay at a distance. Trust me, with such attitude most people won’t like you. For example, if you are selling a product, do not focus on describing the features that much. Other individuals do not care about you, your product, nor anything else but this: “What’s in it for me?”
Whenever you see a customer, understand that he/she will be asking you that question even if he/she doesn’t speak. How useful is your stuff? Where is my gain in here? Those are the questions they will have in mind when they come to purchase something.
So, instead of saying: “This product is a diamond! It took years to be made. A lot of research have been put into it.” Say something like: “This product is useful for 7 different things.” Give all the details and then say: “It will also save you time and money.” Explain why. Then something like: “This product can improve your life in at least 5 ways.” Explain how it can improve your customers’ life. That’s more or less the idea. I guess you get the point.
Another way to apply this concept is that if you are too proud, you may not consider some important data that your employees or clients are submitting to you regularly. This could come to you through ideas, comments, suggestions and even negative feedback. Humble people listen and change if necessary.
If you read the other articles on this series, you will realize that the common characteristic behind this negative tendencies is: selfishness. If you are absolved with yourself, you will show one or more of these tendencies on your daily actions. The solution is to live a less selfish lifestyle. By changing your attitude, you may change the outcome of your actions. You may be amazed at the results and you will feel happier and successful.